i wanted to blog, but i wasn't sure what to blog about... so i have no idea where this post might be headed, but maybe i'll make a point somewhere in here :)
arguments. disagreements. feuds. fights. throw down with bobby flay? it seems like recently, i've been encountering a lot of these (well, except with bobby flay). not only my own few arguments here and there, but i guess i've seen friends and family arguments lately and i've kind of been thinking about the whole thing... we all have them, and we all deal with them in our own ways. and i guess there's no cookie cutter way to correctly handle a fight. and sometimes, i don't think there's any right way at all. over the past few years, i've learned who i am, and that other people generally are not like me (haha..). family, friends, acquaintances, we don't all handle things the same way. we don't all see things, hear things or react to things the same way either. which is the cause of most arguments anyway... so i guess what i've learned to do is understand that my dad (who i'll use as my example because well.. it's just the easiest, haha) is in no way like me when it comes to anger (and all kinds of things really). i understand that he doesn't live like i do, he doesn't see things like i do, and he most certainly doesn't handle things like i do. all i can do is realize that, and let it go and hope he can do the same with me. we are two separate people with two very different lives. while we live together, and have a lot to do with each other's daily life, i have to allow myself to dictate my own time, my own life and my own feelings, not anyone else. my big way of dealing with people i constantly butt heads with or generally dislike, is just 'outing' them. i don't let them occupy my time or energy, because that's the easiest thing for me to do in order for zero drama to occur. however, at some point we'll all have to deal with someone we tend to disagree with often.. my best advice is just to know who you are, and understand that not everyone is like you. accept that fact, and do your best to live with it. understand that you cannot be held responsible for every little feeling everyone has, because when it comes down to it, we're all crazy different, and you may mean one thing, but someone else comprehends that through a whole 'nother set of eyes and ears. i guess working through an argument, to me, is realizing where the communication went wrong and picking up and moving on from it. most importantly, you can't dwell or focus on the mistakes made.. recognize them together, take note, accept that it happened, and leave it behind you. there is absolutely no way you can take back the past minute, hour or year of your life, the only thing you can do is say goodbye to it and take a step forward.
okay, wow, i'm feeling very dr. phil.. although i'm sure he might have made all of that sound a little less complicated!! :)
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